What I’ve been dreaming of:

I dream of living in a place where the stars aren’t constantly obscured by light pollution and clouds. I want land that I can touch, that I can feel beneath my feet. I’m so tired of the constant intrusions of city life, of living in such a tiny space, surrounded by others on all sides. Although I hated the small town of 10,000 that I grew up in, I miss the community that forms in a smaller place.

I miss having a long view. I want all of it again so badly. I left the farm at seventeen and always planned on a return to rural life. I knew then I couldn’t last in the city forever and I feel like my time here is up. I feel boxed in and stifled by the people and buildings all around me. These years in dense southern California have worn me down so quickly.

I’m craving a simpler life. I want a return to so many of the things my grandmas have done: making from scratch, both in cooking and gifts. I want to be far away from the press of people in the unkind city. I want the romance of my own garden and my own home. I love working with my hands and I want to create a perfect space.

Leaving the city is practically all G and I can talk about. We ordered a 200 pg e-book on off-grid solar living (for $5! such a good deal!) and we have been drooling about building a little cabin ourselves, building some of the support systems and using our hands to create something with love. Not only is it a cool, cheap (around $5000 including land and building costs) endeavour, doing something like that would remove us from the city environment we feel so opressing, and we’d be living in a more sustainable way. Living off-grid sounds so freeing because you need so little money for bills. There is nothing we want more than a relaxed lifestyle where we can spend all the time we want together, adventuring and living a good life, and if that means cutting back our expenses to practically nil and living in a little cabin and living close to the land for a while, that sounds just fine with me!

For the next couple years, we will probably be stuck in cities because we both have educational goals we want to fulfill. It’s kind of depressing to think about the long road ahead before we can actually make our dreams a reality, but at least it gives us a lot of time to plan and save up and find the perfect place to build our little home.


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